Thursday, 13 April 2017

Black Sheep

I don't know if it's the result of being sober, or my age, or my recent brush with possible death, but I've been affected more by the signs of Spring this year than ever before.

The branches laden with blossom, daffodils in the hedgerows and newborns in the fields all strike me as unbearably poignant.

We're in Scotland for Easter, and the field at the back of the house is filled with tiny, Instagram-worthy, frisky little lambs.

They're all snow white except one, who's jet black from the tip of his tiny nose to the end of his twitchy tail.

I'm with you, buddy.

I've always felt an affinity with the black sheep. I've always seen myself as a rebel. I've always wanted to colour outside the lines, push the boundaries, break the rules and ignore the government guidelines.

One thing I still struggle with about being sober is the thought of being too good.

But then I looked at all the lambs playing in the field and I thought if those are a bunch of people out on a Friday night, then which one is the black sheep? Which is the outlier, the rebel, the individual?

It's me. It's us. It's those of us brave enough not to drink when everyone else is.

So, feeling reassured that I've still got 'it', I went to the fridge for a Beck's Blue and spotted the redcurrant jelly and mint sauce, all ready for the traditional Easter leg of lamb.

What do you think the family would say to a nice nut roast?

Happy Easter to you all,

SM x


  1. I'm with him too! Jealous of your beautiful spring days, I'm procrastinating on packing for Bali for the last of some warm weather listening to Brene Brown ( her amazing Ted talk on Shame) can you please post the link to pre- order your book? Will they post to Aus? Thinking I Might preorder for some of the lovely mummy's in my life, Mother's Day here in early May, thanks x

  2. Awwww!!! We've lots of ickle lambs near we're we live!! They are so full of life and can't help but make you smile :-)!

    I've always been a black sheep, mainly in the wrong way, and now I'm the black sheep of the family in a good way! I'm the healthiest, most sober member of the family. I will always have a wild crazy mischevious side of me, which I've realised is still there without the booze!!

    We are off to centre parcs this morning, fist sober visit because normally I'm sat nursing a hangover, waiting to see how early I can have a drink at the pool bar! But my Becks blue and my trainers are packed and I'm
    Looking forward to good food, family time and early morning runs. Happy easter everyone, and enjoy Scotland and the lambs SM xx

  3. Happy Easter SM! I struggle with the prospect of standing out, and previously have gone with the herd rather than run the risk of having to answer questions about why I'm not drinking, but am getting braver at this now! Have just returned from a group Easter break, and am pleased to report that me staying sober whilst everyone else drank barely raised any interest - hoorah!

  4. These days I think it's much more bad ass and rebelious to be sober in a society that promotes numbing out!:)